Caught Red Handed!

[Northerner]

For a minute there I thought you said the newspaper used "Caught red handed" as the headline Quite a story, thanks for sharing.

[nointelhere]

I was going to post a reply but after that last one I just don't think mine measures up lol..

Your experiences are as valuable as anybody's.
Quite frankly your fantasies also, although not here, it would be off topic for this sub-forum and thread.

[MuddySkater]

I've been caught three times :

1. In my mid twenties I lived in Teesside ( North East England ) while there I found a small wooded area with a old silted up creak bed, the mud there was around 4ft deep and one afternoon in just a pair of trunks I wandered down and enjoyed myself for around an hour before submerging deep into the mud. A few minutes went by and two teenagers turned up they were clearly bored and started throwing stick and small stones in the the mud, It wasn't until half a house brick landed inches away from my head did decide to stand up! I must of swallowed either some mud or water and coughed to clear my throat while the teenagers weren't looking. They turned to see a 6ft mud covered figure in the bog pointing at them, scared they screamed and ran off - I quickly jumped in the stream and got washed and left before they came back.

2. 2014 I was living in Lancaster ( North West England ) after a week of work I just needed to relax and went out walking, it was there I found this old semi overgrown wooden jetty that went out towards a silted up muddy area just off the main river, the mud was so soft and sticky oh it was heaven around 5ft deep and you could swim through it like being in cream. Well my third of fourth visit there I stripped down to a pair of swimming trunks and bagged my clothes and stored them under the jetty and slipped into the mud, around twenty minutes later I heard someone coming down the jetty so with a deep breath I went under - I waited and then slowly came up, I wasn't fully visitable but my eyes met this dog looking down at me, standing next to the dog was this middle aged woman smoking a cigarette. The dog made this noise and the women looked at the dog then her eyes caught mine! she froze staring at my eyes. As I took a breath in and slipped under the mud again and slipped under the jetty she didn't see or notice me and while I waited for her to leave I got out and quickly got washed in a near by farm water feeding tank. I later heard she came back with someone and found foot prints but nothing else.

3. More recently I now live in Rural North Lincolnshire, there's a near by construction site of houses being made near a muddy patch of ground - I wasn't expecting anyone to be there on a Sunday as I put my red tracksuit on and slipped into the mud! wet but sloppy it was heaven I just went under and held my breath and as I came up I felt water hitting the top of my head then on my face, as I opened my eyes there stood a guy in his mid 40's urinating he looked stocked as did I, no sooner had he stopped and zipped up turned and walked off I got out and left.

[john_hose_bag]

I was caught red handed once - near where I (very unexpectedly and suddenly) sank over my head several years prior. It was a relatively public area, but I assumed there was just enough foilage to hide me, and I walked into a muddy looking shallow stream. I got about knee deep in what turned out to be more water than anything else, before noticing a few very disturbed looking parents shooing their children along an adjacent path to a nearby playground. Haven't been back (for that purpose since).

[Jumpoff_Joe]

Don't you mean caught "brown-handed?"



1. When shooting "She Will Do Anything" starring Skye, her acting carried in the wind so much that the Fire Department was called. The assistant on the shoot alerted me and I turned around to see a fire truck and crew marching down the wash about 300 meters distant. We waved, but they did not see us.

2. When shooting with Litty, I recall several times where we had unwelcome onlookers. One tried following her and my assistant around in the woods, asking if they needed "help" repeatedly. He got lost in a hurry once I approached. Another time a birdwatcher - complete with binoculars, khaki shirt and matching hat! - came right up to her as she was changing clothes. She told him to scram - Litty was taller, very fit, and probably made an impressive argument.

3. In a soon to-be-released scene, a truck with two people pulled over and watched BabyFilth and I working together. You can hear them drive off at one point in the scene. At the almost the same location and a couple of years later a county truck pulled over, complete with flashing lights and as they started to get out we abandoned the shoot and wrote the location off.

4. Towards the end of shooting a movie with Ophelia, we were caught by an angry gawker and a park host. Apparently, the duo was spotted by Ophelia as we were actively shooting. My instructions to everyone when that happens: turn around and wave and smile. Don't get defensive, and don't get embarrassed. Later, the park host told me that if anyone else complained, we would have to go. We had a good relationship with the guy from there afterwards (I would bring him craft brew) until he decided to quit and a new guy came in who was far less friendly.
(Yes, this scene is also in active post-production.)

[Jumpoff_Joe]

...I felt water hitting the top of my head then on my face, as I opened my eyes there stood a guy in his mid 40's urinating he looked stocked as did I, no sooner had he stopped and zipped up turned and walked off I got out and left.

Well, that sounds like a real pisser! (Sorry, I couldn't resist.)

Thankfully, I haven't been peed on since I was very little.

[rubik-pillow]

Many close calls myself but no actual confrontations… I’ve been lucky.

The worst close call I’ve had was in a quarry this summer… a pickup truck crossed my path about 100 ft straight in front of me while I was zipping right towards it on my bike. By the grace of god the driver must have just been looking forward and did not notice me. I turned around and rode out of there as fast as I could, have not visited since, and at least in daylight I don’t intend to.

The only time I might have been spotted was only about a month ago… a paraglider snuck up on my while I was playing in a quarry delta. I was covered in it neck down, all I could do was run to the nearest tree and wait for him to fly on, which he did. I have no way to know whether he actually spotted me or not, but I was DEFINITELY within eye shot or the guy; I could see him pretty clearly. As long as the guys not a snitch, that’s all that matters.